homesick

Sheu, Rachel and my bro left to Gold Coast airport to pick Shue Jeen and Ching Yee up from the airport. Being all alone in the house allows my mind to wonder. I started thinking back of home and before long my eyes were all red and I definately had one of the worst cries ever.

I had been here only for a few days, and the situation has already been like this. The longest time I had been away from home is a night and after 1 night, I can't help but feeling melanchony. I went around doing stuff for the house with housework, and it work a little I guess, but it seems that had only depressed the feelings for a little while. I didn't really want to tell my mom, since she too had been trying to adapt to the fact that I am not home with her. I don't want her to worry. But listening to her talk make me yearn to be with her...

Being all alone in this room really make me think of the times my mom used to disturb me and how I would complain. It's not that I dislike her disturbing me, but it had been such a routine between the both of us that it had sort of became a game. I think back home, my mom too is going through the same thing as I am, that was what she told me. I brought books, ebooks, psp and I-pod and yet I have no interest in doing any of those things.

I miss home. I cant help but wonder, how am I going to cope with this for 2 years? Yes, I will be going back in december, but now, december seemed so far away. I wish time would pass faster, then I can go home and meet everyone again. Having my brother helped combat it a little, but not much. Even after getting off the laptop chatting with my mom, I could feel the tears are struggling to come out. My bro will be going home soon, so will things be worse then??

I feel like I had suddenly been forced to grow up, to grow independent. Maybe its because for all these while I have been coodled and had everything done for me and after 1 plane flight, I had to do everything for my self. This sux. I am having orientation tomorrow and I am seriously hoping that I can make some new friends and maybe the homesickness would lessen. But honestly, I really can't imagine myself staying here until december. for now.

I miss home...

But I can't go home, not until december.

So, I hope that at least the homesickness will go away.